[Last quote from "Girl Quotes Translated to English"]

Trying my hand at some common dating profile copy:

"I'm curvy" - I'm fat

"I'm a BBW" - I'm very fat and also ugly

"I have (x number of) kids and they're my world" - I regret having these kids which make it so hard for me to date

"I love adventures" - I love selecting a new show to binge watch

"Looking for a partner in crime" - looking for a dick or looking to have food/drinks bought for me

"I love hiking/the outdoors" - I like being in nature no more than once a month but tweet and upload photos incessantly when I do

"I'm a badass chick" - I'm a basic bitch with no intellectual interests