Anna Diehl #fundie 924jeremiah.wordpress.com

As a shepherd of the flock, your job is to keep the flock focused on God. You can hardly succeed at doing this when you’re confusing God with Satan. Just look at those New Testament Pharisees: what a train wreck. You don’t want to be like those morons. And yet the prophet who is going to be playing a Moses-type role during the end times is going to look and sound a lot more demonic than Jesus did to the Jews. Of course this is only because the litmus tests we’re using to tell God from demons these days are completely irrelevant. We think that anyone who gets off on God killing people can’t be aligned with Him. Why ever not? Shouldn’t a true prophet of God be displaying a zealous devotion to God’s agenda? We all know that people don’t die by accident in this world—God kills them. If God is killing people, He obviously has good reasons for doing so, and any prophet who is truly aligned with Him will not be publicly beefing against His Divine agenda. Because God is going to be doing so much killing during the end times, His devoted prophet is going to come across as a rather bloodthirsty sadist, especially when the media goes to work with their usual biased reporting. This is going to result in a bunch of wide-eyed parishioners coming to you asking, “How can someone like that really be from God?”

As we explain in some of our other end time preparation posts, God is going to be performing all kinds of devastating and destructive miracles through His end time representative. You are going to see film footage of this person appearing to kill and maim people merely by pointing at them. You’re going to see stereotypically “good” targets like emergency workers and hospitals getting nailed by God’s destructive power. Efforts to help the hurting will be dramatically sabotaged. Impossible alterations of matter will occur: skyscrapers being turned into ice, asphalt morphing into molten lava, sidewalks behaving like quicksand. Don’t believe it? Read your Bibles. If you can believe in a worldwide flood, God causing the sun to stand still in the sky for Joshua, and Him creating a dry path through both the Red Sea and the Jordan River, why is it so fantastic to think that He can cause a city street to turn into a carpet of stinging insects? Didn’t God turn all the dust in Egypt into a plague of gnats? If God could open the earth to swallow up the rebellious Korah, then close the earth again immediately afterwards, why can’t He perform similar feats down a city street? He can and He will. If you’re going to blow off prophetic warnings of the end times, make sure you’re not blowing off the wrong ones. The end times are not going to be at all like these idiots in the Church are saying. All of this guff about America turning Islam or President Obama cooking up evil conspiracies behind the scenes. You ought to know better than to believe any prophecy that turns your focus off of God and onto idiot demons and their foolish humans. While countless false prophets are filling your heads with a bunch of theatrical rot just to try and make a name for themselves, we are telling you what is actually in store so that you can start seeking the Holy Spirit’s wisdom now about how He wants you to guide your flock when the theological crisis begins.

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Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

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