How would I go about sharing my two cents as an ex-incel from a left political perspective (communist)?
Disclaimer: not an 'AMA'.
I'm 20 something years old and with an inhuman amount of effort I've 'ascended' to being a normie, with my own day job's income and place, a halfway finished BA at a university, a couple of girlfriends (none higher than a '4') and a current girlfriend I've had sex with on multiple occasions (also probably no higher than a '4' or maybe '4.5' if I asked the layman), all met at work and school.
I'm by no means very attractive naturally (though I've fixed much of it with callisthenics, proper self-care, proper amounts of sleep, improving my posture and facial expression, etc.) spergy (diagnosed with Asperger's, personality development disorder, MDD), rather frequent drug user and had the typical bleak loner and clown-like childhood.
In spite of what I would call the 'reactionary' character of the online incel community, I highly sympathize with it and believe that it is the product of legitimate structural failures of modernity against men and that the cause lies in the increased social demand to be more than just an authentic individual and partner to a woman, but a full 'product' that needs to be valorizable as more than a partner but as a commodity and status object in general.
With the decline of old rigid patriarchal structures this subjectivity in relations has opened up but in a world where, increasingly, value must come from socioeconomic status, which can primarily be sold materially in the form of: disposable income or other forms of capital, a conformed physical appearance and outwardly matching confidence and (sexually enticing) personality; all elements that improve one's ability to sell oneself and acquire the means to purchase others. Attraction is a financial transaction exchanged for either financial or social capital, and one must have both or be able to acquire either one with the other to succeed in obtaining intimacy. I strongly believe that 'neurodivergent' incels in reality fail to find intimacy because they would never want to sacrifice their authenticity for conformity, and that this is then communicated through a resentment of the object of desire (an authentic female companionship).
I'm not much happier now that I've improved myself, but in effect that is the real problem: anyone can 'ascend' if they truly try hard enough, but it will never really fulfill any real needs, because the real desire is for a world within which folding oneself over so hard just to fit in and obtain what is today arguably the most important form of social capital, a female companion, is so necessary.
My ideal would not so much be a world in which society itself coerces women to (once more) conform to being the guaranteed other to men (enforced monogamy, arranged marriage, social division in sex, etc.), as this would equally remove any element of authenticity, but rather a world in which propertied social capital is an impossibility and as as such serves no real inherent added value in the experience and reproduction of daily life but that sex and romance is then reduced purely to its own, non-vital element of life. I realize the former is that which is attractive to you because, on a metaphysical level, you have already concluded that there is a difference between men and women so fundamental that it cannot be changed by altering society to have the woman be less of an object (inherently, you believe this will always be the case), but to me that reality is not only false but untennable: if our predicament is in effect that we have strayed from a metaphysical essence (patriarchal society) by introducing subjectivity and that we must either return to that essence or suffer mentally, then I would honestly rather kill myself twice over as it would imply that the human experience as such already exists, that there is nothing to discover or experience whatsoever but something in particular one must just as well conform to as the current predicament.
Essentially this means that for all intents and purposes incels are right about the present state of things, and do identify a problem, and are right when saying that, objectively, when one is an incel, there is little more to do than try to 'looksmaxx' or whatever oneself to be as close to a 'normie' as possible. And likewise I share the agreement that this is a decrepit state for a society to be in. I simply don't think salvation lies in the past.
I'm not sure I'm making much of a point here anymore, so I'll leave it at this. I haven't gotten into why I'm a communist now and, frankly, I don't think it really matters in more than how I roughly view the incel question on a macro-scale. Again, I know this is no AMAs, and I wasn't looking for an AMA either. I just wanted to tell you my experiences and perspective and get your opinions on them straight.
If this wasn't the right place to make this post but such a place exists please link me to it before nuking.
E: apologies for how everything in the title starts in caps; nothing else here is formatted that way and it looks stupid.