Quote# 88403

I've got a really cool story that I thought you all might want to hear! A couple of weeks ago, my son's biology teacher was teaching the theory of EVOLUTION!!! This really surprised me since my son goes to a "Christian" school. What I want to know is how a school that calls itself Christian can believe in something that denies that Jesus is Lord, and that they would even go so far as to try to brainwash their students into believing it too. Anyway, it didn't work on my son! After class was over, my son came up to the teacher and asked him, "if we evolved from monkeys, how come we can't talk with monkeys?" My son said that his teacher's face turned red with embarrassment, and he had to excuse himself from the room! The teacher had no answer to that question and he knew it! The teacher hasn't talked to my son since, he's still embarrassed that a high school student destroyed his theory!

OND, Rapture Ready 137 Comments [7/17/2012 3:26:37 AM]
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The teacher's face turned red with frustration and the overwhelming desire to beat your son about the head and shoulders for his total ingorance.

7/17/2012 3:30:52 AM


The teacher was embarrassed for your son because that is one of the most ignorant and misinformed 'arguments' against evolution that exists.

7/17/2012 3:40:03 AM

This has got to be a Poe.

7/17/2012 3:42:15 AM


Maybe it's me, but some of the gibberish spouted off in this post reminds me an awful lot like monkey talk. I think monkeys might understand this guy/girl better than we humans would.

7/17/2012 3:42:27 AM

Percy Q. Shunn

Oh, how cute!

7/17/2012 3:46:27 AM

Assuming you didn't pull that story right out of an orifice of yours, I find it certainly more credible, the teacher had to excuse himself out of the room, to find a safe place for laughing about that ignorant little blockhead of your son.

7/17/2012 3:47:33 AM


Chimps and gorillas can use sign language, which I doubt you and your idiot son are capable of.

In short, humans and 'monkeys' can talk with one another and at the end of the day, even a monkey who can't sign is still more intelligent than you.

7/17/2012 3:49:09 AM

Doctor Whom

If we're in the same species as the Rapture Readians, how come we can't talk any sense into the Rapture Readians?

7/17/2012 3:53:33 AM


The teacher COULD have argued that monkeys (I'm going to be generous with the OP and use the word interchangeably with "apes") easily learn to understand human languages, learn to talk in sign language, and that humans also can learn simian sounds and body language.
He could have...
But that teacher knew well enough that this student was just encouraged by his parents to challenge him, that he wouldn't listen to the answer, and that encouraging him would just mean the next "question" would happen in the middle of the class instead of after it, and that punishing the interruptions would just convince the kid that he's being martyred and that his parents were right.
That's a no win situation, but the teacher picked the lesser evil. That's being an adult, OP, try it someday!

7/17/2012 3:54:25 AM


Wow. Where to start? First of all, it's not the teacher's theory. Secondly, this is from someone who thinks every "kind" of animal can fit on a wooden boat and can be rounded up and tended by 8 people. Thirdly, my aunt taught biology for thirty years in a catholic school. When I asked her how they approach evolution she scoffed and said "there's pretty overwhelming evidence of evolution" and they spend a whole semester on it exclusively. With all the pretzel logic that goes on with theology, seems an easy enough reality to squeeze in to your lesson plans.

7/17/2012 3:57:33 AM


Um...I hate to break it to you, but how humans and monkeys got here has NOTHING to do with the fact that we can't talk to them like Aquaman. We've taught gorillas and chimps how to "read" simple symbols, and we've taught dolphins how to "speak" to us using special paddles.

Also, is it just me, or do the people on RR still use WAY too many smileys? I can barely even focus on writing a response with those dancing yellow screamers. How can they think--oh wait, that's the POINT.

7/17/2012 4:11:43 AM


The teacher was embarrassed by the kid's stupidity.

7/17/2012 4:15:48 AM

N. De Plume

I’m of German and Norwegian descent. I don’t speak either of those languages.

7/17/2012 4:20:25 AM


"The teacher hasn't talked to my son since, he's still embarrassed that a high school student destroyed his theory!"

Lying for Jebus, much? Concerning a little court case just over six years ago; where was he when the defence team needed him...?!

"I've got a really cool story that I thought you all might want to hear!"

And that just proves you're Lying for the Lord.

7/17/2012 4:29:11 AM

Random Jerk

Doesn't the shame orgument work against Gawd too "if we en teh monkeys wer created by the shame Gawd, huw cum v can't talk with monkeys?"

7/17/2012 4:37:48 AM

Sentry Gun

The teacher was only embarrassed because he failled at teaching your son how to use his brain.

7/17/2012 4:48:39 AM


The teacher probably left the room to laugh without being mean.

7/17/2012 4:50:51 AM


1. No one believes for a nanosecond your bullshit story actually happened.

2. The question itself is beyond stupid. It's like saying: my ancestors came from Germany why can't I speak german?"

3. It shouldn't be possible but the emoticons make you look even dumber.

7/17/2012 4:58:13 AM

Mister Spak

"if we evolved from monkeys, how come we can't talk with monkeys?"

If we were made frm dirt, how come we can't talk with dirt?

Why is your face so red?

I bet you're embarrassed that I destroyed your myth.

7/17/2012 5:08:17 AM

Mystical Chicken

"If we evolved from monkeys, how come we can't talk with monkeys?"

Uh, we can (at least, with sign language and lexigrams). Look up Kanzi the bonobo and/or Sue Savage-Rumbaugh on YouTube.

(and yes, I know bonobos are apes, not monkeys, but we didn't "evolve from monkeys" either, so yeah.)

7/17/2012 5:09:10 AM


I reckon the teacher was wishing he'd taken up a different profession.

Like Kamikaze pilot, or pornographer in Iran. Anything would be better than trying to teach a blockhead who comes up with that "argument" against evolution.

7/17/2012 5:09:54 AM

Tolpuddle Martyr

That's...special Timmy!

7/17/2012 5:11:21 AM

Filin De Blanc

Because as we all know, the ability to speak language is transmitted genetically. Oh wait, that's not true at all.

7/17/2012 5:16:20 AM


The teacher was red with frustration because your son was dense enough to ask something already refuted a bajillion times.

7/17/2012 5:17:30 AM


@Mystical Chicken--I lol'd at Sue Savage-Rumbaugh. You win an internets

7/17/2012 5:21:13 AM

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