FloridaTulpamancer #sexist reddit.com

My Explanation for How the "Normie Platitudes" Originated...

1. Standpoint Theory.
This is an idea used by Marxists and Feminists. The rundown is that incels and noncels have different lives and thus develop different experiences and attitudes about the world. Further, a noncel will have difficulty identifying with an incel's plight. Think of it this way: You know that severely impoverished people exist, but can you fathom what it would be like to live like them? You probably take clean water and shelter for granted because of your economic position. In the same way, sex and relationships for noncels are easy or at least possible, thus they assume that their experience must be true for all people. This is why you hear "take a shower and socialize" as if that will fix everything. For them, it DID work, but not due to it's own devices: They were simply more attractive than you are. The first person who said "Be yourself" was likely a Chad, because that's truly all he would need to do, and he probably didn't understand that non-chads do not share his genetic privilege, or he was willfully ignorant, which leads to my next point:

1. Denial of the Nature of Sexual Selection.
Sexual Selection is one of the fundamental pillars of our understanding of how sexually reproducing creatures evolve. However it comes with a very uncomfortable implication: If mating is nonrandom and based on genetic inheritance, than there must be some members of the species that have the qualities being selected for and others who do not, through NO FAULT OF THEIR OWN. This flies in the face of "there's someone for everyone" because it implies that there must be some members who are the objective losers of the mating game. It also implies that if someone has a spouse, that person is attracted to them for reasons which they have no control (looks) rather than for their honest achievements which they have worked for. We want to believe that women love us "for who we are" and that we ALL have a chance at pair-bonding, despite all evidence of the contrary. This is why you're often told that it's "your fault" you can't get laid for whatever reason.

1. Denial of the Nature of Sexuality Itself.
Sexuality is much like which foods we like or what colors we like in that it is malleable, but ultimately INVOLUNTARY. We don't choose which aspects of a person we are attracted to, what things are turnoffs, etc. Why would anyone purposefully choose to be a pedophile, for example? This truth has another bad implication: If we wind up having an attraction which we do NOT like, there's nothing we can do to change it. This is important because it explains why women are called "shallow" for being attracted solely to looks. We don't like the idea that our love is based on eugenics-esque factors which we have no control over, and would prefer if people loved based on "personality." Thus, if someone demonstrates attraction based on "bad" factors, we say it must be their fault somehow, as if they chose to be attracted to bad boys or skinny women, because to do otherwise would open the door to criticizing sexuality itself. This is where "Personality is what really matters" and "you're chasing the wrong women" comes from: It's a criticism based on the wishful-thinking of how sexuality works rather than the reality.

(Submitter's note: Yes, the sections are really all numbered 1.)

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Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

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