Quote# 125556

Being good with kids seems to be a trait commonly associated with pedophiles. It is likely that we pay more attention to kids (and treat them with more respect).

It is okay to be sexually attracted to children, there is no harm in that. It is wrong to hurt a child, but an attraction does not lead to harm. Plenty of adults are attracted to other adults and manage not to hurt them.

I am a very positive influence on the lives of multiple children. Other people tell me so, their parents tell me so, the kids love to spend time with me. My closest relationship is with a girl who I am attracted to. She loves me and would live with me if given the chance, she comes from a negative home and I give her way more opportunities to do things (and attention and positive encouragement) than she gets at home.

I don't look at her and think I want to have sex with her. That is a vast oversimplification; like saying a man sees a women and just thinks I want to have sex with her. I want to provide her a source of comfort, a safe place to come to and a safe person to talk to. I want her to be happy, I want to help her grow into a capable and confident women, I want her to be successful in her life and yes, I would also like to have sex with her. I won't do the latter, but all of the former things are things I can and do do for her.

Saying Pedophile = wanting to have sex with a child, is like saying being attracted to an adult = want to have sex with that adult. While it is technically true; it is far too simplistic of a view to have real meaning. Just like other adults we want a relationship, we want the comfort of knowing someone we love loves us back, we want to help that person be happy and safe. Sure sex is a part of it, but it is nothing close to the whole.


That's sadly why you're considered to be sick in the head. Because you don't understand that it is NOT okay to be sexually attracted to kids. There is something wrong with each and every pedophile out there. Your refusal to admit your sickness is what makes you dangerous to be around a child. To have sexual desires towards a child is exactly like saying "I want to have sex with a child". You simply aren't saying it out loud. You're keeping it in your own head(And that's the scary part).

This is my last reply to this discussion. I am just appalled by everything you sick and demented people are saying. You're a sick fuck and like I said to the other person. I pray for any child that comes in contact with you.






So if a person thinks "I want to kill that person" are they a sick fuck even if they never act on it?

If a person thinks "I'd like to rape that person", but never acts on it, are they a sick fuck?

If a person thinks "I'd like to hurt that person", but never acts on it are they a sick fuck?

Or does thought-crime only apply to those have a sexual attraction to kids? I can't choose not to be attracted to kids anymore than a homosexual can choose not to be attracted to their own sex (note: I wouldn't chose not to be even if I could, but that's another story). I can chose how I act though and everyone who knows me finds my actions to be acceptable.




Having a single thought when you're angry about killing the person you're mad at? No, this is normal.

Constant thoughts about killing someone every day of your life? Yes. That is a sign of a mental illness much like being a pedophile.

Having a single thought that you may want to hurt a person? Perfectly normal.

Having thoughts every day that you want to hurt people? That's a sign of another mental illness.

Struggling every day of your life because you're sexually attracted to kids? Yes. I am sorry. That's a sure sign of someone with mental issues.

These are all signs of mental illnesses. Which is what you have -- an illness. Which is why you shouldn't be around kids nor should any pedophile. There's a reason adults with severe mental illnesses have their kids taken away. Endangerment. What makes you and the others sick fucks is not that you have a mental illness. It's that you're trying to defend it and say there's nothing wrong with it. That it's "okay". When it's not it's very far from being okay. This is what makes you dangerous to be around a child.




I don't have a mental illness, I have a sexual orientation. I am not ashamed of it, but I know that people would judge me for it no matter what my actions are. So I don't tell them. I'm not hiding it everyday, I'm going about my life without really worrying about it; but knowing I will never tell anyone.

By your logic being gay and hiding it is/was a mental illness.

Almost everyone I know (including many kids/parents) trusts me absolutely around kids. And I have never hurt a kid. I'd rather have them be the judges and have them judge my actions. They don't need to know my thoughts to judge my actions.

I don't constantly think about my sexual attraction to kids. It's more like having a friend who you are interested in romantically, but who see's you platonically. Sure sometimes it is awkward, but you still get along well and are good friends. You aren't likely to suddenly rape that friend. There's no all consuming sexual urge, it's no different than a sexual attraction anyone else feels.

It's only likely to get awkward in the case of pedophiles if the child returns the sexual interest. Than you have two consenting people who must withhold their feelings due to social stigma.



A child by law can't give consent. So you don't have two consenting people. You have 1 consenting adult and 1 poor child being mislead by said adult.



Consent laws are dumb. Children can consent, if two children have sex according to consent laws they raped each other (which is why a large number of sex offenders are minors). There should be extra protections for child sex. But they can consent.
When you were a child it's VERY likely a pedophile talked to you, maybe even held you, or even hugged you. Did you get hurt by it? most liely no. Although if you have been sexually abused I'm VERY sorry :-( it's terrible I know.




pfta2a, reddit 14 Comments [3/19/2017 4:04:40 PM]
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Citizen Justin

I don't know if this is 'fundie' but it is certainly very dangerous and very wrong.

I have some sympathy with people who feel unwanted sexual attraction towards children, but do not act on it.

This guy however... I am certain he's already acted on it, 100% certain, and has managed to rationalise it to himself so that he will abuse again. The last three lines pretty much prove it. Yes, he is a sick fuck.

3/19/2017 4:27:05 PM

Psycho Tits

Here's the heart of Pfta2a's most pressing problem:

It's only likely to get awkward in the case of pedophiles if the child returns the sexual interest. Than you have two consenting people who must withhold their feelings due to social stigma.


This particular individual expresses a sexual interest in children between the ages of three and 13. He argues he has never acted on those urges, but sees nothing wrong with doing so if he should find a child who would consent but cannot because of what he sees as an antiquated social stigma. In reality, however, kids cannot consent to sex because their brains have yet to develop - especially true of younger kids, who don't grasp the potential consequences of eating too much junk food let alone of having a sexual relationship.

The three-year-old who wants candy for breakfast, lunch, and supper would not be permitted her wish by wise parents or guardians. She certainly cannot consent to sex. An older child, maybe around 12 or 13, may believe herself capable of consenting to a relationship with an adult - and especially an adult who showers her with affection.

This man doesn't see that as grooming. He doesn't recognise the simple fact that his seeking out kids from damaged homes and offering them an "alternative" in the form of a 'friendship' with him that involves gifts and positive attention is in fact grooming...or is going to tell us he treats all the kids to whom he has access with even-handedness and offers them all gifts and attention. (The answer to that is almost certainly no, he doesn't treat all kids as his 'friends.')

The problem with this guy, beyond the obvious I mean, is that he doesn't seem to recognise that desire and consent are two different things. Children are incapable of consent, wholly, and it's largely because their brains haven't even finished developing let alone enough to understand the link between cause and effect - especially among younger kids; but also among teens who want to be treated as adults but who don't understand what that entails because they, in addition to the fact they're still growing, lack life experience.

A pedophile cannot find a consenting child anywhere because they do not exist. If the OP had that firmly in mind, he would be far less frightening to read.

3/19/2017 4:40:52 PM

THX 1138

The REALLY scary part isn't that he doesn't know he is a groomer, he knows he is deep down and lies to convince himself it isn't bad.He even contradicts himself in the fourth sentence about his desires with the child.

3/19/2017 5:27:42 PM

Uilleam

So if a person thinks "I want to kill that person" are they a sick fuck even if they never act on it?

If a person thinks "I'd like to rape that person", but never acts on it, are they a sick fuck?

If a person thinks "I'd like to hurt that person", but never acts on it are they a sick fuck?


Nope, but you make it clear in this quote and others that you have acted on those desires and are in denial over how harmful they are. You contradict yourself.

3/19/2017 5:54:28 PM

No One In Particular

No. No. NO. Children CANNOT consent. Period. They're not ready to have a relationship, and that has been proven time and time again. How many times do we have to say this before you get the message and leave these poor kids alone? You clearly need some psychological assistance; sorry to say, but you're mentally ill.

3/19/2017 6:45:17 PM

Anon-e-moose

Consent laws exist.

And especially after Operation Yewtree, they always will.

Deal with it, little subhuman paedo nonce.

3/19/2017 7:16:08 PM

Gabriel LaVedier

This is 31 flavors of fucking insane, that much is certain and not controversial.

However, I slightly agree with the interlocutor on the subject of transient, situation-specific thoughts versus permanent fixations. In a properly determined case, that could be mental illness. OCD has shades of that and I know it from having it. I'm not monomaniacal, I have counting and symmetry compulsions and fixate on completeness, usually meaning finishing not just discreet steps of a task but usually a full task unless each step contains a satisfactory conclusion. I was a really voracious reader because once I started a book I almost literally couldn't put it down. I'll lose time reading and not even realize. But the point is, that kind of fixation, especially on violence, could be something that needs treatment, at least some talk therapy if not anti-anxiety meds.

3/19/2017 7:25:17 PM

Menomaru

Where's Chris Hansen when you need him?

3/19/2017 9:04:48 PM

Isa

No. No, this is not OK, you festering pile of human garbage. I'm going to vomit.

3/20/2017 1:40:42 AM

Mister Spak

"Saying Pedophile = wanting to have sex with a child, is like saying being attracted to an adult = want to have sex with that adult. While it is technically true; it is far too simplistic of a view to have real meaning. Just like other adults we want a relationship, we want the comfort of knowing someone we love loves us back, we want to help that person be happy and safe."

You think you can have an adult relationship with a child?

Then it goes downhill: "Sure sex is a part of it,"

3/20/2017 5:30:00 AM

Doubting Thomas

While he says that he won't have sex with that underage girl, the rest of the relationship is just very, very creepy and likely to lead to a sexual encounter. The red flag comes when he first says he won't have sex with her, but then later says he would like to. The idea of giving her a "safe place" and a "safe person to talk to" sounds an awful lot like grooming, especially when he talks about seeking out children from broken homes. Easiest way for a pedo to get a child is for them to prey on those who are already mixed up due to a bad home life and offer them a "happy" or "safe" place to go.

I think I need a shower after reading this.

3/20/2017 5:41:02 AM

PETF

@Menomaru
Here he is.

3/20/2017 9:05:37 AM

Demon Duck of Doom

That's literally textbook grooming.

3/20/2017 10:09:07 AM

NonProphet

As everyone else has said, that's grooming.

Also, if someone thinks "I'd like to rape that person"? YES, they are a sick fuck, even if they don't act on it. Sane people do not want to rape others. (BDSM fantasy roleplay/CNC is another creature entirely, and I'm not going to go into the ethics or psychology of kink.)


3/20/2017 10:50:19 PM

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