[Anonymous: No, some people have a fetishists were they have no control over when they have sex. They even go so far as to have one of the people pretend to break in, but it is all consentual and there is a safe word and all that stuff.]
i don’t care if it’s your kink, or if it’s ~actually consensual~ , you’re normalizing rape and abuse!!!!! stop!!!
11 comments
See, in the Tumblr discourse wars I'm torn, because on one hand I'm really uncomfortable with things like incest shipping, littles and Daddies, also weird kinks like this...
bbbuuuuutttt on the other hand, I can't see how it really hurts anyone. So yeah, I'm torn.
EDIT: Also people who hate the latter are always these smug, sneering, stuckup, Oppression-Olympic-having, fuckwits, and the people who love the first are, y'know, really fucking weird.
OK, no. If it's consensual it's not rape. Period. It's kind of in the definition, really.
Thing is, everyone has fucked up kinks like this. All the people I've ever peeled back enough layers on to get to such a level of sharing, there's always some kind of rape/power fantasy in there, whether it's little/daddy, humiliation, physical torture, de-humanization, emasculation, castration, etc.. More often than not, it's mostly on the side of wanting to be the 'victim'.
I think that *deciding* to be the victim in something is how we cope with *being made the victim* in so many other things and ways by the mere shape of the universe. It is our way of getting power back.
So in many ways it isn't fucked up... It's abjectly and distinctly human, and treating it like it is fucked up is exactly the problem.
Thing is, BDSM rests on the notion of Safe, Sane and Consensual.
This is one step away from claiming all BDSM normalizes rape... and yes, I've met people who claim that.
One of my partners is into what is called "consensual non-consent." She's a rape survivor (like me), and this kink is actually one of the ways she overcomes the events of her past. Safewords & aftercare are always in place. If someone told her that she needed to stop because they thought it normalized rape, she'd tell them to stop trivializing her experiences.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
