Quote# 100557

First of all, up until the Tower of Babel, they had to speak some language.

What language was that?

What's the best candidate?

In Revelation we see ...

Revelation 20:12 And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works.

What are these books that are mentioned?

I believe they are the 66 books of the KJB.

Thus we have all peoples, nations, languages and tongues, standing before the Judgement Seat, being read to from the KJB.

Thus if they speak Jacobean English in Heaven, I assume they spoke it on earth at first.

Just a speculation.

AV1611VET, Christianforums 74 Comments [4/15/2014 3:32:41 AM]
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The Mocking Bard

So they spoke English before there was an England....do you take lessons to be this stupid or is it natural?

4/15/2014 3:42:16 AM

Broton of Loch Ness

Well, if that's not worth an instant click of the WTF button, what is?

4/15/2014 3:45:35 AM

Mister Spak

They speak arabic in heaven, because islam is the real religion.

4/15/2014 3:53:40 AM

Captain Bacardi

Really, is there any doubt at this point that AV1611VET is simply the longest running, most elaborate, most committed poe in the history of the Internet?

4/15/2014 4:19:39 AM

anothga


4/15/2014 4:39:45 AM

grimsoncrow

gotta be a poe.

4/15/2014 4:44:20 AM

creativerealms

Sadly it's AV1611VET, so it's no Poe.

4/15/2014 4:48:27 AM

Doubting Thomas

Because the English language didn't even exist 6,000 years ago.

And God is also white, is American, is a Republican, and drives a big pickup truck.

4/15/2014 5:04:44 AM

Glandu

At first read, I didn't notice the KJB fetish; I was about to meh. After all, that's just another harmless Bible Student. Misguided, but not fundie by any standard.

Then, all of a sudden, "KJB" did tick into my head. English is not my native language, & I was struggling to get the real main point of the post. Once you get it, there is no doublt we have a fundie : whoever bends its own holy book to its own fantasies & thinks he's speaking truth is really, really dangerous once back in the real world.

4/15/2014 5:10:54 AM

creativerealms

AV is a reality revisionist.

4/15/2014 5:17:26 AM

Kuno

I believe they are the 66 books of the KJB.

But isn’t Revelation itself one of these 66 books? So John has written his own book into that very same book? Wow, that’s some kind of Stephen King/Dark Tower shit!

Are these books mentioned anywhere earlier in Revelation? Or is this just a case of John of Patmos being in dire need of a decent editor?

4/15/2014 5:26:48 AM

wintermute

Kuno: Close, but the crazy goes deeper than that.

The Tower of Babel is from the book of *Genesis*, so they're reading 65 books that hadn't been written yet in a language that won't exist for thousands of years. That's pretty impressive.

4/15/2014 5:35:40 AM

JeanP

The books in Rev. 20:12 are not the KJAV but books telling which of the deads were saved and which are not.

I want to know the kind of mental gymnastics he used to get such contrived explanation.

But after all, "It's our faith they need to see --- not our knowledge."

4/15/2014 5:39:35 AM

anevilmeme

AV1611 has come out of the Poe closet?

4/15/2014 5:49:50 AM

dionysus

The ancient Babylonians also used words like X-ray, smart phone, and neutrino because, at this point, why the fuck not.

4/15/2014 6:04:45 AM

Canadiest

A very, very bad one considering many of the KJV books were written AFTER 40AD.

Then there's the roots of English which are well known as every languages that shaped it are known, many still spoken. English evolved from other languages and grows still.

4/15/2014 6:05:15 AM

Snide

Methinks he doth metheth too much.

4/15/2014 6:08:10 AM

John_in_Oz

I'm convinced.

That you're an idiot.

4/15/2014 6:17:32 AM

Broton of Loch Ness

@creativerealms
"Sadly it's AV1611VET, so it's no Poe."

Unless AV1611VET is himself a poe creation... an invented character. I have often been tempted myself.

4/15/2014 6:23:46 AM

Anon-e-moose

@Glandu

"At first read, I didn't notice the KJB fetish"

'Fetish'? You've certainly hit upon something, that all these KJV-onlyists haven't realised, or daren't; only subconsciously (and therefore what closet-cases all fundies really are):

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personal_relationships_of_James_I_of_England

Ever wondered why it's sometimes referred to as the Queen James Bible, AV1611VET...?!

Gay king, thus gay Bible, therefore gay God.

Just the facts, ma'am. [/"Dragnet"]

4/15/2014 6:27:49 AM

Vladimir Putin

They speak Russian in Heaven. Or they soon will!

4/15/2014 6:28:05 AM

Musicalbookworm

I think that is actually the dumbest thing I have ever read here.

4/15/2014 6:39:23 AM

Thinking Allowed

I'm surprised that AV1611VET knows what Jacobean English is.

4/15/2014 7:14:45 AM

John

This from the guy who once said that the water from the Flood was sent to Neptune. His stock in trade is to say something stupid and outrageous and wait until someone challenges him so he can respond with some version of "prove me wrong".

4/15/2014 7:35:08 AM

SpukiKitty

I couldn't say anything due to being speechless at the epic, atomic-powered stupidity...so I just pressed the "WTF" thingy.

4/15/2014 7:46:25 AM

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