Quote# 55323

Question (by Jesus FREAK) : If evolution is true how come cannot speak monkey?
i try to be a christian evolutionist at the zoo and try talk to the monkey but i cannot.

if evolution is true why can i not speak monkey

Answer(by jessica s) : hahaha way to get the evolutionists at a stump! I would also like to know why monkeys aren't forming into humans nowadays! ;)

well the Bible says it's not true...soo..I'll go with that!

jessica s &Jesus FREAK, Yahoo Answers 75 Comments [1/2/2009 12:44:37 AM]
Fundie Index: 10
Submitted By: J Arcenas

Quote# 125162

ippy...It doesn't matter if you don't believe. :) That is just your path of development. You will also get there like everyone else. Maybe in your next birth you will be a Yogi living in the Himalayas...you never know! ;)

Making someone understand is very difficult. Taking the simple instance of the moon landing deniers. How can you possibly convince them that people have actually landed on the moon? Anything you argue or show them could be mocked and dismissed. That is the way their mind is programmed and that will not change easily.

Similarly, if someone does not believe that there is anything beyond the mundane realities of the body, earth and so on, there is nothing anyone can do to convince them that there is something. All philosophy and detailed spiritual teachings are for those who accept them in the first place.

Sriram, Religion and Ethics 7 Comments [3/19/2017 1:50:25 PM]
Fundie Index: 2
Submitted By: Nearly Sane

Quote# 125550

in response to a woman finding out her boyfriend is a pedophile

His sexuality probably can't be changed. But that doesn't mean he is a threat. Many men find woman attractive and are not found attractive by those woman. They don't go and rape them. So, your boyfriend isn't a threat to children just because he is attracted to them.

Remember, it isn't wrong to be attracted to children;

howlinggale, reddit 4 Comments [3/19/2017 3:48:04 PM]
Fundie Index: 6

Quote# 125534

My conclusion. I don’t need any gigantic penis and 8-packs. All I need now is my own immortal body that can fly. I wanna meet Jesus in the air. And, in the New Millennium, I can ask Jesus to go naked swimming with me in an island in the Pacific. I really would rather peek Jesus’ immortal gorgeous penis bumping and jumping just like a very extremely gorgeous pendulum swinging backward and forward in a really fast way when we both go naked playing volleyball on pearl-white sands of beach. I don’t need a huge jumbo walking HIV in human form with 8-packs and a gigantic penis, earthly and fast aging and dirty and deadly and very poor and very stupid. Bear in mind. I’m an extraordinarily smart Bella Boy, and I’ve found my Edward, Lord Jesus. I’m taken. So, any earthly Jacob with 8-packs and a gigantic penis is simply just a huge jumbo walking HIV in human form to me. Don’t bother me and get lost.

usachinanukewar, All-out US-China nuclear war, looming, to wipe out one-fourths of the earth 6 Comments [3/19/2017 1:51:15 PM]
Fundie Index: 7
Submitted By: Denizen

Quote# 65852

[Pro-abstinence blog]

When you play with fire, there is a 50/50 chance something will go wrong, and nine times out of ten it does.

June Swenson, Abstinence 216 Comments [9/21/2009 8:26:16 AM]
Fundie Index: 235
Submitted By: Tiger

Quote# 53075

I will not read anything written by an athiest, or anything like the site that was posted making fun of Christians. I will read anything that is informative of current events, politics, etc, that is not slanted or biased either way. As a Christian I do read the Bible, of course, and lots of Christian reading material but I can also tell you what celebrity made a fool of themselves or discuss any current event. I don't live in a bubble, but I am definitely not OF this world.
I would be glad to read anything written by a former atheist, who now lives for God. But that's it. It's not that I think they are all "evil" or something, but as Christians we cannot participate in things that go specifically and directly against God. It hurts God, and it hurts and can hurt and confuse us.

DayoftheLord, city-data.com 55 Comments [12/1/2008 2:02:33 AM]
Fundie Index: 8

Quote# 81242

if I was King of the United States, I would issue the following orders:

1. All abortions will stop immediately, with the exception of life-threatening pregnancies.
2. Certain lifestyles will cease immediately.
3. All prisons are to release their inmates immediately, with the exception of those on death row, who are to have their sentences carried out as soon as DNA confirms their guilt.
4. For-profit organizations operating on Sunday will not be tolerated.
5. The United States will return to a single-income lifestyle, with men being the primary breadwinner.
6. U.S. Armed Forces veterans will be given special privileges.
7. All taxes will cease immediately, with the exception of a 10% tax on yearly income -- (if that works).

AV1611VET, Christian Forums 143 Comments [5/13/2011 3:47:54 AM]
Fundie Index: 169
Submitted By: Orlor

Quote# 14669

The most useful arm to the Christian warrior is probably the rifle or the carbine. A rifle is a long arm with a rifled (grooved) barrel chambered for a full power cartridge, and intended to be fired from the shoulder. A carbine is simply a more compact version of the rifle, most often with a shorter barrel and chambered for an intermediate power cartridge.

The most probable scenario that the Christian American, called to fight for God, family, and country, will be presented with is that of the guerrilla resistance. He will be facing an enemy occupational force that will have great superiority in materiel and organization. Outside sources of supply and instruction will not be likely. The wisest course in this situation is to choose weapons and tactics that minimize supply, training, and maintenance problems.

Gospel Plow, Gospel plow 43 Comments [9/7/2006 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 7
Submitted By: Redhunter

Quote# 95333

We have seen the sodomites attacking business for refusing to provide a gay cake, gay bed and breakfast etc.,

I can see a Proposition exempting churches (Obamacare is already forcing christian businesses to provide their wicked "reproductive health" , passing, legislator being passed to circumvent or challenging their exempt status. The appeal court would ban the exemption, the governor would not appeal, and there would be no recourse based on the ruling today....

The people are getting the government they are voting for. The sodomites think this ruling was great today.


We see a president who promotes tolerance, while ostercizing Christianity at every opportunity, mocking of the faith, twisting of the scripture and hateful of anything moral. He shows a disdain for anything American at every opportune time.

But too many are content with the pacifier the president has given them, all the while dismantling this once great, God fearing country.

Christians? We know it is all immoral. We see the divison of this country, the undermining of our constitutional rights (which leads to enslavement) to establish a country like so many have fled. We know a sinful nation is a reproach.

We also know judgment is coming. God foretold these times. God is the one in control- and He is the only peace to be found in these tumultuous times............

M4EVERHIS, Rapture Ready 32 Comments [7/5/2013 3:07:06 AM]
Fundie Index: 20
Submitted By: Night Jaguar

Quote# 54466

It appears on youtube you can say the F word. You can cuss and even do many sins. But you can't call Homosexuality sin. Christians believe that homosexuality is sin as it clearly states it throughout the bible. However youtubes policies say you can't call homosexuality a sin. This is what I did in this video. This is why I was banned. Everybody would agree that Youtube is more "Anti-Christian" than Christian. You can tell by going to atheist channels where they can say the F word and bad mouth Jesus Christ, even calling Jesus Christ a homosexual. Youtube allows that. This is pure Christian discrimination on YOUTUBES part. Youtube as you know doesn't believe homosexuality is sin. I do. So this was destined to happen. Here is the email below youtube sent me. You guys don't try to reactivate me I need a vacation anyways lol. I will be back again. My entire channel was backed up as we all knew this was going to happen sooner or later. I am surprised I lasted this long with youtube being more on the "Godless side". God bless you all it was a blast! Oh also very important. As you know the wiccans and pagans and atheists and satanists and homosexuals lol, did I leave anybody out? we all had our differences. They in no way were responsible for getting me banned. You guys know I strongly disagree with those lifestyles and believe in Jesus Christ instead but I want all my Christian brothers and sisters to NOT harbor any resentment to these groups as they were not responsible nor have they caused it.

[Note: Shockawenow didn't get his youtube account suspended because he called homosexuality a sin, he got suspended for setting up his official website to phish other youtube accounts.]

Shockawenow, Shockawenow.com 37 Comments [12/19/2008 7:18:37 PM]
Fundie Index: 7

Quote# 125415

In the blockbuster Hollywood movie, THE GREEN MILE, starring Tom Hanks and Michael Clarke Duncan, the major theme of the movie is about two little girls who are brutally raped and killed by a deranged psycho. John Coffey (played by Michael Clarke Duncan) is blamed for the murders and goes to the electric chair for a crime that he didn't commit, but not before revealing to Tom Hanks and others working in the prisonhouse that he has some special healing power, a gift, which allows Tom Hanks to telepathically communicate with Hanks and show him what really happened to the two little girls.

In the movie Tom Hanks is portrayed as having a urinal tract infection, making it extremely painful for him to urinate. At some point in the movie, John Coffey grabs Hanks by the throat and then places his hand down upon Hank's genital area, and then Hanks is immediately healed, going home to have sex with his wife 4 times during the night (which his wife in the movie says he hadn't been able to do since he was 19 years old). This is what Hollywood calls entertainment?

The prison warden's wife has an incurable brain tumor in the movie, but Hanks and his co-workers at the prison decide to sneak John Coffee out past midnight, bring him to the warden's home, and have him heal the sick woman. As the warden stands bewildered in his living room, Hanks and his peers bring John Coffey upstairs into the wife's bedroom without notice or even knocking on the door. To heal the sick woman, John Coffey (African American) slowly places his lips upon the Caucasian wife's lips to kiss her for a prolonged period of time, during which time the healing process is taking place. There is sexually immoral spirit prevalent in the scene. Undeniably, sexual immorality and violence are the two most predominant evil spirits saturating Hollywood movies. It's all part of the Communist moral decay and deliberate Communist subversion of America. America has known and will continue to know until her demise, the depths of Satan.

THE GREEN MILE is further evidence of Hollywood's insatiable infatuation with child rape, pedophilia, sexual perversion, interracial sex, adultery, and the most heinous of sins and crimes. Out of all the crimes that the movie's writers, directors, and producers could have picked... they chose child rape and murder. That speaks volumes as to the Satanic mindset and wickedness of Hollywood as a whole.

UNBREAKABLE, HEREAFTER, FOREST GUMP ... there's too many films to mention, all place the thought of pedophilia into the viewer's mind. Why the infatuation with child sex abuse in Hollywood? The answer is quite obvious.

David J. Stewart, Jesus is Savior 20 Comments [3/15/2017 7:29:40 PM]
Fundie Index: 5

Quote# 125412

An estimated 95 percent of Faith Driven Consumers will not buy tickets for Disney's "Beauty and the Beast" this weekend because of the "exclusive gay moment" in the film.

That figure is the result of a survey of 6,700 people, completed by the Faith Driven Consumer organization. And many of those surveyed are also less likely to spend money with Disney as a whole.

The FDC's numbers suggest personal faith matters to 41 million Americans who spend $2 trillion annually.

Chris Stone is founder of Faith Driven Consumer.

In his release of the group's findings, Stone said, "Disney's decision to celebrate LGBT individuals with an 'exclusively gay moment' in Beauty and the Beast is a testament to the LGBT community's success in advocating for and achieving high-profile recognition of their worldview."

"Faith Driven Consumers understand the LGBT community's goal for inclusion by Hollywood and Corporate America," Stone continued. "For FDCs this is not homophobia or bigotry. There are many complex realities in the world that Faith Driven Consumers simply do not wish to have addressed with their children via entertainment, especially in a family movie."

"Entertainment broadly has become highly politicized and sexualized, meant to inculturate audiences," he said. "This excludes Faith Driven Consumers who are left with an increasingly limited number of acceptable entertainment options for their families. They want entertainment to remain just that—entertainment."

That same survey revealed 58 percent of Faith Driven Consumers think the motivation behind Disney's decision to include an "exclusively gay moment" in "Beauty and the Beast" was "to normalize homosexuality."

A little more than 50 percent of Faith Driven Consumers say Disney does not meet their entertainment needs well.

Faith Driven Consumers, CBN News 14 Comments [3/15/2017 7:29:02 PM]
Fundie Index: 1
Submitted By: Demon Duck of Doom

Quote# 76750

Health Care Law Violates All Ten Commandments

This one law violates all of the Ten Commandments. Let's work our way backwards:

#10. You shall not covet.

As with many bills, politicians sold ObamaCare by stoking envy. It goes like this: "What other people own — what they earned — you are entitled to." Covetousness, wanting what others have, is cloaked as a "right." But a "right" to a product (like insurance) or service (like health care) means others are forced to pay for or provide it, with no concurrent "right" to be justly compensated.

#9. You shall not bear false witness.

Remember when President Obama made the wild accusation that doctors were removing children's tonsils and amputating diabetic patients' feet to make money? Virtually no mainstream media found it worth reporting that Obama's malicious false witness was debunked.

#8. You shall not steal.

Stealing is not only pointing a gun and demanding, "Give me your money." It's also taking money under false pretenses — frauds and scams like Bernie Madoff's, where money willingly handed over is used for something other than what was promised. You know where the bulk of the money taken for ObamaCare through taxes, fines, and raiding other accounts will go -- not to actual health care or insurance, but to 159 new bureaucracies, and tens of thousands of new government employees.

#7. You shall not commit adultery.

ObamaCare channels millions of dollars to graphic sex education programs which instruct kids as young as kindergartners to be sexually active. Read what some of the comprehensive sex education programs teach. This sets children up to take marriage vows lightly since "it's just sex."

#6. You shall not murder.

ObamaCare allows government funding of abortion, the murder of the most innocent.

#5. Honor your father and mother.

As parents age, it oftentimes falls on their children to make their health care decisions. It can be heart-wrenching. But it is our responsibility and duty as their children. Under ObamaCare, that privilege will be stripped from us and given to unaccountable bureaucrats. They will ultimately decide what health care our parents can get. Medical advances will be stymied, and what is available will be rationed. The elderly will be denied hip replacements and heart surgeries, medical wonders that provide full and productive lives. This will lead to unnecessary disabilities and untimely deaths. Parents will be at the mercy of bureaucrats tasked with calculating costs, rather than a family motivated by love and honor.

#4. Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy.

Why was Congress compelled to hold the final vote on ObamaCare on a Sunday? No looming deadline demanded immediate action by the House of Representatives. It's as if they went out of their way to thumb their noses at God and prove their disrespect. The Senate vote was held on Christmas Eve.

#3. You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain.

Many people limit this to avoiding using God's name as a curse word. Jewish scholars, however, so solemnly followed this commandment that they wouldn't even write out the full name of God. They were cautious not to take His name lightly. President Obama gave a pen with which he signed ObamaCare to Sister Carol Keehan, the nun who runs the Catholic Health Association. Why? Her seal of approval appeared to give a Catholic blessing to a bill that her superiors, the bishops, rejected. Among the "Religious Left" credited by Nancy Pelosi were United Methodists and the "Faithful Reform in Health Care," a coalition of liberal religious agencies. Their titles as religious leaders, ambassadors of God, were shameless props used by politicians to give the thin veneer of God's approval. In effect, they used God's name, His reputation, to promote something that contradicts His commandments.

#2. You shall not make for yourself a carved image (false gods).

What do those who worship false gods do? They sacrifice to those gods, even despicable gods, in hopes that they will get something in return. Of course, these gods can't deliver. ObamaCare became a holy grail that surpassed a desire for health care reform, morphing into an obsession to pass a bill. Congressmen sacrificed their reputations and careers to pass a bill — a despised bill. It became a false god. And it isn't delivering.

#1. There is only one God.

ObamaCare sets up government as the one who will supply our needs and provide for our health. It places us on the path of socialist countries, where people expect the government to provide for them and then riot when governments cut bloated spending. In contrast, Americans throw Tea Parties to stop government expansion and spending. Most Americans know that their faith is better-placed in the true God who loves them more than any government official can. Propaganda and promises — even from Obama's religious leaders — will not overcome Americans' objections to ObamaCare. And we have good biblical reasons.

Wendy Wright, Concerned Women for America 165 Comments [10/8/2010 3:42:28 AM]
Fundie Index: 225
Submitted By: DevilsChaplain

Quote# 77732

Rush Limbaugh blasted President Obama on Wednesday for thanking the Native Americans and using "every cliché" during the White House's official Thanksgiving proclamation.

The conservative radio talk show host said he was so shocked by Obama's "wildly distorted" version of the holiday that he initially thought it was "a prank."

Limbaugh read the President's words and added his own commentary.

"This Thanksgiving Day, we reflect on the compassion and contributions of Native Americans, whose skill in agriculture helped the early colonists survive, and whose rich culture continues to add to our Nation's heritage," Obama said in the declaration.

Limbaugh added, "…at their casinos and on their reservations."

In the proclamation, Obama said "This spirit brought together the newly arrived Pilgrims and the Wampanoag tribe — who had been living and thriving around Plymouth for thousands of years."

The radio host chimed in, "So, we were the invaders. The Indians were minding their own business. We were incompetent idiots. We didn't know how to feed ourselves so they came along and showed us how and that's what Thanksgiving is all about."

Limbaugh complained that Obama said "nothing about the Constitution in his Thanksgiving Day proclamation because he's got a problem with it."

He explained to the caller what he thought the "real" story of Thanksgiving:

"The true story of Thanksgiving is how socialism failed," the radio host tells a caller, adding "the Indians didn't teach us capitalism" and that "we shared our bounty with them… because we first failed as socialists."

Rush Limbaugh, Daily News 159 Comments [12/1/2010 7:11:17 AM]
Fundie Index: 231

Quote# 125345

[Comment under "I'm curious, how does this group reconcile Soviet aggression against Finland, the Baltic states and Poland? How does it reconcile the Red Army's mass rapes in Europe and Manchuria at the end of the Second World War?"]

Countries like Poland and Finland were dominated by fascists and fascist sympathizers before WW2, so I don't feel much sympathy for them.

Obviously the Red Army raping people was objectively horrible, and in many ways was a result of the absolute hate (which was also cultivated by Soviet propagandists) most Soviets had for Germany after their Nazis invaded the USSR and murdered millions of people. As far as I'm concerned every rapist deserves to be shot, but there was a reason behind it that has absolutely nothing to do with socialism.

tupendous, Reddit - r/ShitLiberalsSay 6 Comments [3/14/2017 3:51:14 PM]
Fundie Index: 1
Submitted By: JeanP

Quote# 72669

[In a thread on gays having visitation rights in hospitals, the one guy who steps slightly to the left of completely nuts gets the banhammer]

Originally Posted by Lambeth
I am actually pretty okay with this. It's a human right to see your loved one in the hospital, not a gay right.

Violation of multiple rules.
[04] Defend the Faith and God's infallible Word, not the ways of the world, homosexuality, liberalism, socialism,
[05] Do not promote unscriptural ideologies.
[13]No liberal left wing political agendas

MrMann, RR 143 Comments [5/1/2010 8:28:47 AM]
Fundie Index: 265
Submitted By: necroforest

Quote# 91914

Creationist Textbook, io9.com 96 Comments [1/5/2013 5:51:44 AM]
Fundie Index: 323

Quote# 60963

["The Hebrews crossed the 'sea of reeds'. Most Jews agree on this. After all, the first 5 books are theirs."]

The first five books are theirs? Um, no. Moses was a Christian. Sorry.

prosperousindividual, Internet Pastor 221 Comments [3/28/2009 12:14:01 AM]
Fundie Index: 424
Submitted By: Robert

Quote# 63360

"If God doesn't matter to him, do you? (GUNSHOT)

Answers in Genesis, billboard 193 Comments [6/19/2009 8:24:06 PM]
Fundie Index: 232

Quote# 62489

[Question about the logic in light being created on the first day, but the sun being created on the fourth.]

The sun isn't the only source of light you know? Think of a cloudly day, there's light coming from somewhere.

fancier_rmv04, Yahoo! Answers 199 Comments [5/20/2009 3:01:04 PM]
Fundie Index: 253

Quote# 79872

[emphasis added]

Sergeant Rebekah Havrilla alleges in the complaint that in 2006, after her military supervisor repeatedly sexually harassed her, she was raped by a colleague she was working with at the time.

"He pulled her into his bed, held her down, and raped her. He also photographed the rape," it reads. Havrilla reported the incident within a month.

In February 2009, she reported for active duty training and, upon seeing her rapist, went into shock.

"She immediately sought the assistance of the military chaplain," the lawsuit reads. "When SGT Havrilla met with the military chaplain, he told her that 'it must have been God's will for her to be raped' and recommended that she attend church more frequently."

Unnamed military chaplain, The Raw Story 125 Comments [3/9/2011 8:53:03 AM]
Fundie Index: 257
Submitted By: Table Rock

Quote# 64958

Among the camp’s practices, posted on the blog of a youth whose parents are forcing him to attend:
1. Kids in the program are not allowed to speak to anyone, not even their parents, for at least the first two days.
2. Kids are not allowed to go anywhere unless they are accompanied by at least two other participants, one of which has to have at least 8 weeks of prior indoctrination.
3. Kids are not allowed to keep a journal or a diary
4. Kids are not allowed to discuss what goes on in the program with anyone, not even their parents
5. Kids are not allowed to have contact with any family members other than parents, who also go through the program
6. Kids are not allowed to have any physical contact with any human being other than a hand shake or a pat on the shoulder, and only when authorized.
7. Kids are not allowed outside of a small geographic area within Memphis, even if accompanied by parents, without prior written authorization
8. Kids are not allowed to listen to any music that is not explicitly Christian (Bach and Beethoven are specifically forbidden as being non-Christian)
9. Kids are not permitted to enter restaurants that serve alcohol
10. Kids are not allowed to speak after 9:00 p.m. under any circumstance
11. Kids may be placed in a state of isolation where they are not allowed to communicate with one another"

Straight Camp, blog - NYC Liberalism 242 Comments [8/18/2009 6:27:33 PM]
Fundie Index: 324
Submitted By: JennyB

Quote# 80386

(a mother's response to her daughter coming out of the closet)

"My daughter Cara Louise,

"In all the years of my life, yesterday was the worst day. Not only have you turned your back on me and Dad, but you've turned your back on God. Clearly He is testing you and you have Failed this test.

"I don't know what I did wrong to raise a lesbien daughter. Maybe God is puneshing me. All I know is I couldn't sleep last night and when I did for only five minutes, all I could think of was your perverted life style.

"I am sorry but your Dad and I cannot except you back into our house as long as you are following the deeds of the Devil. We will still love you but we cannot except you as our daughter as long as you are living your life in sin.

"I've asked Scarlet and she tells me that she knew this entire time. She has told me that she does not believe in God and I know that she can be saved. I hope that you can be saved my dear daughter but until that time I can not say that we are family. I will miss you and my heart is broken

"Your mother."

Cara's mother, ExChristian.net 88 Comments [4/1/2011 5:07:31 AM]
Fundie Index: 272

Quote# 72804

In response to:
I don't get it. Why do many many on this board diss Earth Day? I helped volunteers plant nearly six thousand oak trees last Saturday at the Forest Preserve by my house.

But does planting trees help bring people to Christ? It's like going to third-world countries to feed the hungry. It doesn't do a starving man any good to keep him alive for another day if he's doomed to hell anyway. It doesn't do anyone any good to plant trees for people if they haven't heard about Jesus. The future of this earth is destruction....You don't "Bring people to Christ" with inanimate objects. He is knowable, but unless that tree becomes paper, and eventually a Bible, it will have no value in expressing how to know The Creator who made the tree.

The Penquin/OnceWasLost, RR 158 Comments [5/8/2010 5:01:36 AM]
Fundie Index: 280

Quote# 73342

Twenty years ago, I attended an “open house” at my daughters school. One of the subjects discussed was a lesson plan called “ free to be you and me” which taught that homosexuals were normal.

I stood up and said “ Why is it that homosexuals have a much higher rate of suicide than heterosexuals? Why is it that alcoholism is rampant in homosexuals? Why is it that the average life span is so much lower than heterosexuals?

Could it be because homosexuals have sexual intercourse with, lick, suck and eat human $hit?

I got thrown out, but the curriculum was not adopted ;-)

stephenjohnbanker, Free Republic 259 Comments [6/1/2010 7:04:49 AM]
Fundie Index: 382
Submitted By: DevilsChaplain
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